It appears that ACORN volunteers worked so well when it came to cheating in the 2008 democratic caucus contests that Barack Obama is considering using ACORN volunteer soldiers in Afghanistan.
ACORN's penchant for padding numbers when it comes to democratic caucus votes would give Barack Obama flexibility in padding his additional troop count. 1,000 ACORN volunteers could easily equal 30,000 additional troops based on ACORN accounting methods.
Since ACORN is demanding either the reinstatement of their already promised funds or the continuation of funding based on prior years, why not pay ACORN those suspended funds to go to Afghanistan? The sight of ACORN soldiers with petitions and clipboards in their hands instead of guns may put more fear into the taliban than anything else we've tried.
One possible downside to this idea could be that even if ACORN did find Osama Bin Laden, odds are high that they would not be able to reproduce his proper address correctly even if Osama were to provide it.
(Warning! The above editorial is satire and should not be confused for the truth).